


Can't Sleep Love

by bunni_art_929



Series: Sleepless [1]
Category: Moominvalley (Cartoon 2019), Mumintroll | Moomins Series - Tove Jansson, 楽しいムーミン一家 | Moomin (Anime 1990)
Genre: Fluff, Insomnia, M/M, Moomin is oblivious, Pining, i spent too long working on this, like so incredibly oblivious, snufmin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-07-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:40:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25317691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bunni_art_929/pseuds/bunni_art_929
Summary: After a long and sleepless night, Moomin confides in Moominmamma who tells him about an old wives tale: "If you can't sleep, there's somebody out there thinking about you." But who could have been the one thinking about Moomin so much? Perhaps there's someone else in Moominvalley who couldn't find sleep last night either.
Relationships: Mumintrollet | Moomintroll & Snusmumriken | Snufkin, Mumintrollet | Moomintroll/Snusmumriken | Snufkin
Series: Sleepless [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1897690
Comments: 18
Kudos: 109





	Can't Sleep Love

**Author's Note:**

> ok i know it's not perfect nor the best of ideas but i spend far too much time writing this and even longer editing it so i just need to get it out into the world before i lose my mind. anyway, enjoy!

For everyone else in Moominvalley, it was an especially lovely summer morning. The sun rising cheerily from between the mountain peaks promised another glorious day, and the birds were all singing to welcome it in while the light scent of freshly-bloomed flowers drifted lazily on the soft breeze. Yes, most folks would consider it a wonderful time to be awake.

But not Moomin.

He couldn’t help but grumble at such a lovely day when he was in such a foul mood. The poor troll had himself buried deep under his bed-covers to ignore the shining morning, his eyes screwed closed to block out the sunlight and a pillow pressed to his ears to muffle the birdsong. But it was no use. Even after trying all night long, Moomin still couldn’t fall asleep.

A loud growl from his stomach ended up being the last straw. _If hunger doesn’t kill me first_ , he thought, _I will surely die of boredom instead_. Moomin flopped over onto his back in defeat and opened his eyes, immediately recoiling at the intense sunlight streaming in through his window. After a moment of adjustment, Moomin managed to catch a bleary-eyed glance into his vanity mirror. The sight in it made him groan. His sleepless night had left his fur tousled and his under-eyes dark and sunken in, which would be sure to reveal last night’s plight to anyone who saw him today. 

Another complaint from his stomach forced him to sit up, and after a long stretch, Moomin managed to pull himself out of bed and trudge downstairs.

As usual, Moominmamma was up early preparing a hearty pancake breakfast. Moomin joined her in the cozy little kitchen, offering a sleepy “hullo” before slumping down at the table. Thankfully, the familiar smell of Mamma’s wonderful cooking had managed to take the edge off of his irritability.

“Good morning, Moomin, dear. Aren’t you up early today!” Moominmamma mused, her back to Moomin as she worked at the stovetop.

“I’d say it’s more like I’m up very, very late, Mamma…” Moomin yawned. “I didn’t get a wink of sleep last night.”

Mamma turned around and her eyes widened at the sight of her son’s disheveled appearance. “My goodness, Moomin! Do you feel ill?”

“No, only extremely tired.” Moomin sunk deeper in his chair. “But I might as well be sick, I feel so awful…”

“Well, coffee ought to help some,” said Mamma, starting the kettle. 

“Thank you, Mamma.” Moomin smiled gratefully. “You know, even though I’m not sick, it’s still a bit worrying that I didn’t sleep at all, don’t you think? Hopefully there’s nothing wrong with me…”

The only response he received was a thoughtful hum as Moominmamma continued with her preparations. The long silence that followed her vague response made Moomin very nervous.

“Oh Mamma, _is_ there something wrong with me?!”

With a chuckle, Mamma left her cooking to simmer and went to take a seat beside him. “No, I don’t believe so. Probably just a bout of insomnia, I’d say. But…”

“But?”

“I was just remembering something that Grandma told me long ago.”

Moomin leaned forward, eager to hear more. Every time Mamma brought up Grandma and her recipes, Moomin wished that he could have met the wise woman himself. If anybody knew what was the matter with him, it would be Grandma.

“She once told me that if you were having trouble sleeping, then somebody out there is thinking too much about you.” Mamma shook her head with a smile. “Frankly, I believed it to be a rather silly idea at the time! 

“I didn’t remember Grandma’s wisdom until a few years later when I had first met Moominpappa. I wasn’t sleeping well for days on end, and eventually, I complained about it to Pappa. When he admitted he had been daydreaming about me all night long, I finally made the connection!”

The romanticism of this sentiment fell on deaf ears, however. “Well then,” Moomin huffed, “whoever was thinking about me all through the night had better _stop it_ and let the _both_ of us get some sleep!”

Moominmamma laughed at this and patted his shoulder. “I’m sure that whoever it was would be very sorry to know that they kept you up, dear.”

Mere moments after Moominmamma had flipped the last pancake, the previously quiet kitchen was brimming with talk and laughter as friends and family all gathered for breakfast. Moomin gratefully accepted a steaming mug of coffee and began like himself again after a few sips. 

Despite the noisy room (Little My and Sniff had started bickering loudly and Snorkmaiden was trying to reason with them, unsuccessfully), Moomin felt as though something… someone was absent. To his dismay, Moomin realized that Snufkin hadn’t joined them for breakfast. It shouldn’t have surprised him; Snufkin preferred to eat breakfast on his own in the early hours of the day. Still, Moomin wished that he had come by; a visit from Snufkin would have been sure to lift his spirits after such a dreadful night.

Oh well. There would be plenty of moments to spend with Snufkin throughout the rest of the day, wouldn’t there?

After everyone had polished off their pancakes, Snorkmaiden suggested they begin the day with a game of tag. Of course, Moomin was quick to volunteer to collect Snufkin. “It just isn’t as fun with only four people,” he had insisted.

But Snufkin proved to be a bit difficult to find. He wasn’t fishing on the riverbank, nor playing his harmonica on the bridge. Perhaps Snufkin had decided to go on a day trip by himself, as he did sometimes. Of all days to have chosen a solitary excursion, Moomin selfishly hoped it wasn’t today.

Upon arriving at Snufkin’s quaint little campsite, Moomin was relieved that all of Snufkin’s things weren’t packed away for an adventure. Though it wasn’t likely for Snufkin to be in there this late in the day, Moomin felt he ought to check inside of his tent for good measure. He poked his head between the canvas flaps for a quick look around,

And there he found Snufkin, sound asleep on his bedroll! Moomin’s fur puffed up a little in embarrassment for intruding on Snufkin while he slept. _Perhaps it’s best to leave him be_ , he told himself, but he couldn’t seem to look away from the sleeping mumrik. Somehow Snufkin managed to look even more serene while resting, which was saying a lot since he always had a peaceful air about him anyway. A strange warmth crawled up Moomin’s cheeks as he watched Snufkin lay there.

After a few too many moments, Moomin managed to pull his head out of the tent. As he wandered back to his friends, he struggled to push aside the disappointment of having to go on through the day without Snufkin at his side.

Finally, in the waning heat of the late afternoon, Snufkin emerged from his tent and shuffled towards the river with his fishing rod in tow. Moomin, who had certainly _not_ been pining after him all day long, was very glad to see him out and about.

“Snufkin!” he cried gleefully as he ran to join him, but stopped short when he saw just how bedraggled Snufkin looked. “Oh dear,” Moomin said, staring at Snufkin’s wrinkled coat and unkempt hair. “You look absolutely awful!”

With a weary smile at Moomin’s bluntness, Snufkin set his pole down at his feet. “You look a little rough yourself, Moomin,” he replied wryly. “There’s no need to worry, by the way; I’m just a bit groggy.”

But Moomin was already worrying. “You were in bed for most of the day, are you under the weather? Or maybe you’re feeling blue? Sometimes I stay in bed late when I’m feeling blue—”

“I’m fine, Moomin. Really.” Snufkin clasped both of Moomin’s paws in his own. “I couldn’t fall asleep last night, so when I finally dozed off around dawn, I ended up sleeping the rest of the day away.”

“Oh, okay,” said Moomin, rather dumbly. Though he had intended to say more, Snufkin’s comment had caught him off-guard. Why did it seem important? It was almost like finding a new puzzle piece but not knowing where to put it. For a while Moomin just stood there, brow furrowed as he tried to figure it out.

He wasn’t shaken from his stupor until he noticed how cold and empty his paws had become. Snufkin had long since let go of Moomin’s paws and was now settling down to fish on the grassy riverside. 

Moomin didn't wait for another second to catch up with Snufkin. He plopped down at his side, all of those thoughts still buzzing angrily in his mind. _Snufkin couldn’t fall asleep last night? Why does that matter? Is it because…’cause I…_

“Oh, are you feeling tired as well, Moomin?” Snufkin remarked plainly, and Moomin shot upright. He hadn’t realized he had been nodding off.

“Ah, well, yes,” stammered Moomin, his eyelids still heavy. “I couldn’t sleep at all last night, and eventually gave up early in the morning. You know, Mamma told me that there may have been somebody out there who was thinking of me all night long and well…

“Wait!” The puzzle piece finally seemed to slip into place. “Snufkin, you couldn’t fall asleep last night either! Do you think there was somebody out there thinking about _you_ last night, too?”

“No...I don’t think so,” Snufkin said haltingly, and suddenly he looked away. “I suppose...that I was the one doing all the thinking.” Even though his face wasn’t visible, Moomin could still see that Snufkin’s ears had turned red.

“Oh?” It took some time before it dawned on him. “...oh,” he repeated, feeling the blood rise to his cheeks. “You stayed up all night thinking of... _me?_ ”

“You aren’t angry with me...are you?” 

“Of course not!” Moomin shook his head vigorously. “Maybe I was a bit irritable about it earlier, but now that I know it was you…I don’t think I mind nearly as much.”

Snufkin glanced back toward Moomin, his worried face softening upon seeing that Moomin was genuine. “Well, in any case, I am very sorry for accidentally keeping you awake all night. It’s just that I…”

“Yes?”

“I couldn’t seem to get you out of my head.”

And then Snufkin’s gentle eyes met Moomin’s, and Moomin thought his heart would explode. He felt his whole face go cherry-red in the wake of it, but once again he couldn’t tear his eyes away from Snufkin.

It didn’t take long for Snufkin’s face to match that color, if not an even darker shade when he realized just what he had said. He broke his gaze and immediately buried himself deep within his scarf and hat to hide just how flustered he had become.

Moomin’s eyes lingered on him for a long time.

Snufkin really was beautiful.

And upon thinking this, Moomin’s paws flew to his face as he scolded himself for thinking such a strange thing about his friend.

It was a while before either of them dared to show their faces again. Eventually, Snufkin managed to cast his line into the water, acting as though nothing had happened. The awkwardness in the air easily rivaled the weight of the late-day heat.

Fortunately, Moomin was much too preoccupied to take any notice of it. Although his eyes were trained on the bobber as it danced upon the water, his mind was running faster than the glimmering stream before him. 

_Snufkin had been thinking about me. And thinking about me “too much”, according to Mamma. And he was thinking about me. All Night Long! But Why? Why_ me _of all folks? And, and about what? What sorts of things was he thinking about me?_

The uncertainty made Moomin feel like he was going to burst. He _had_ to know more.

“What were you thinking about me?” Moomin blurted, and Snufkin froze.

“What—what do you mean?”

“Like…” Moomin already regretted saying anything at all. “Like when you thought of me last night, what kind of stuff did you think about? Going places with me? Or being around me? Or about how I look or something?” Moomin had to force himself to stop babbling by covering his mouth. Why did his voice have to go all squeaky?

Much to Moomin’s dismay, Snufkin took some time choosing how to answer. 

Frankly, this whole conversation made Moomin feel like he was trying to crack open a particularly tough walnut.

When Snufkin did speak, his response was simple yet stilted, as though he had taken time to calculate just how much to reveal:

“Just about all of our upcoming adventures is all.” 

The reply left Moomin feeling crestfallen, but he didn’t know why. 

“And...nothing more?”

He hadn’t meant to say that. The words had seemed to slip out by their own accord.

These words also caught Snufkin by surprise, and he whirled to face Moomin head-on. “Were you hoping for something else?” He sounded surprisingly hopeful.

“M-maybe?” Moomin sputtered, sent into a panic by the question. “I dunno! And what if—what if I _was_ , anyway? You wouldn’t dislike me for it, would you…?”

“Oh, no! Of course not, my dear Moomin. You know that I could never dislike you.” Snufkin gave Moomin a comforting smile. “You really can tell me anything.”

While he appreciated Snufkin’s encouragement, Moomin hadn’t been lying: he didn’t have a clue about what he ought to say, or even what to think. It seemed like a moment to admit to something personal, but somehow Moomin couldn’t figure out what he was supposed to be admitting to! This frustrated Moomin to no end. He very much wanted a good long time to think through all these confusing thoughts and feelings, but that would need to wait for now: Snufkin was still expectantly waiting for his answer.

Well, there was no reason to be dishonest with his best friend.

“I don’t know what I was expecting,” Moomin admitted. “I’m not sure why I said that. I need some time to think this over…I’m sorry, Snufkin.”

“Hmm.” If Snufkin was upset by Moomin’s answer, he didn’t show it. Instead, he just leaned back against the grassy hill and closed his eyes. “There’s no need to apologize. To tell the truth, I think a lot of folks need to learn to just say ‘I don’t know’ and be okay with that’. There’s plenty of stuff that I don’t know, but I’m fairly content not knowing it.” 

Once again he rested his paw on Moomin’s. “But it may be worth it to pursue a better understanding of your feelings if that’s what you’d like to do. A little soul-searching can often do you some good.”

Moomin finally relaxed, grateful that Snufkin had chosen not to press him about this. _Aren’t I lucky to have such a kind and wise friend!_ thought Moomin, feeling a surge of fondness for his dear Snufkin. 

For a moment they just sat there, their paws subconsciously intertwined. 

Though the worst of the discomfort had faded, there was still that stiff feeling of seriousness that came from being so vulnerable. Determined to lighten the mood, Moomin piped up again. 

“Well I’m certain about one thing: I’d love to have a good night’s rest tonight. So, while I appreciate you taking all this time to plan our adventures, would you mind doing it when the sun is up from now on?”

Snufkin’s laugh was lovelier than all the birdsong in the valley. “I’ll do my best, Moomin.”

After all that, their afternoon carried on as usual. The two sat to fish for a long while, their conversations little more than small-talk. 

But Moomin knew that the comfort of the status quo couldn’t last forever. He had many unanswered questions left—certainly more than he had started with this morning—and something told him that if he did some “soul-searching” as Snufkin suggested, the nature of their relationship would never be quite the same. The thought of it made Moomin excited and scared all at the same time. 

But right now, exhaustion like an ocean wave was washing over Moomin and threatened to drag him down to the depths of sleep. He had been without sleep for so long now...surely all of his problems could wait until after a little nap, couldn’t they?

Moomin snuggled down in the long soft grass, eager to sleep the rest of the day away. As he dozed off, the last thing he heard was Snufkin’s voice above him, speaking gently into his ear. 

“Go ahead and rest, my dove,” he murmured. “I promise to keep you off my mind so that you don’t wake.”

And with that, Moomin finally found sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> haHa, you thought they would confess? maybe k*ss? no. it's just pining in this one. i love to torture you.  
> but if you want the one from snufkin's perspective let me know :3c


End file.
